How can one person show how sorry they are to another person? When one person feels they love another person- isn’t that enough – telling them you love them. It feels as though whenever something good happens in my life I always tend to push it away and fuck it up. 

My problem is that for so long I have been treated badly and haven’t known any better so when someone shows me the right way to be treated I think I don’t deserve it and end up doing something to ruin it completely then hate myself even more. 

I met a guy about 2 weeks ago and honestly those 2 weeks have been the best of my life and I feel I have ruined it all. I cannot begin to explain what this boy means to me, how I feel about him and that I want him in my life as my partner. Things were going good and then I had to go and fuck things up – I had to tell the truth because I hate lying and he means more to me than a lie. I would do anything to prove to this boy how sorry I am and how much I want forgiveness and a second chance to prove to him I am a good person, I can stop these things and will open up. I would jump of a cliff if he asked me to just to prove this to him. 

If one doesn’t truely feel bad or sorry for the doings they have done then one wouldn’t cry, feeling like cutting or even ending their life. One hates themselves for this and doesn’t know what to do anymore! 


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